Feeling anxious or on high alert is a normal response to difficult, uncertain or threatening situations. Usually, these feelings settle when the situation passes. For some people, however, being on alert can become a much more familiar way of experiencing the world.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
Experiences of trauma, particularly during childhood, can affect how we respond to stress and possible danger later in life. When someone has needed to be alert to threat in the past, they may find that their body continues to respond quickly to things that feel unsafe or uncertain, even when there is no obvious danger in the present.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Feeling anxious or on high alert is exhausting, particularly when it happens frequently or lasts for long periods of time. When our threat system becomes activated, the body prepares us to respond to possible danger. People sometimes describe these responses as fight, flight, freeze or other instinctive defensive responses.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
For some people these reactions may happen only in situations of immediate danger. For others, particularly those who have experienced trauma or prolonged periods of stress, seemingly small or everyday situations may trigger a much stronger response than they expected.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Learning what helps you feel calmer, more present or supported when this happens can be a useful skill. This is sometimes called self-soothing<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When something makes us anxious or afraid, it can feel easier to avoid it completely. Sometimes stepping away is exactly what we need, particularly when we are overwhelmed. At other times, if avoidance begins to increasingly restrict our lives, gently approaching things in small and manageable ways may help us reconnect with activities and experiences that matter to us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Self-soothing isn’t about forcing yourself to calm down or gaining control over your reactions. Instead, it can offer ways of supporting yourself while difficult feelings and sensations are present.<\/p>\n\n\n\n One way of doing this is through our senses: touch, taste, sound, smell and sight<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Paying attention to something we can see, hear, smell, taste or touch can sometimes help us reconnect with our present surroundings when thoughts, feelings or physical sensations become overwhelming.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There is no need to use all five senses at once. What feels comforting to one person may feel unpleasant or even distressing to another, particularly where memories or trauma are involved. The important thing is to notice what feels helpful to you<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The things you choose don’t need to be complicated or particularly special. They might simply be familiar objects, sensations or activities that bring comfort, interest, pleasure or a sense of connection.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Are there things that you like the feel of, that perhaps comfort you or create curiosity or happiness?<\/p>\n\n\n\n It might be a soft blanket or comfortable clothes, the warmth of the sun on your skin, a warm bath or shower, smooth stones, shells, pine cones, sand, a favourite teddy or stroking a pet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You might notice whether something is warm or cold, smooth or rough, heavy or light. Sometimes simply paying attention to these sensations can help bring your awareness towards what is happening around you now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Are there tastes that you find comforting or enjoyable?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Perhaps an old recipe brings back a good memory, or there is a favourite food you particularly enjoy. It might be hot chocolate or herbal tea, ice cream, something fresh, or a meal you have taken time to make for yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Taste can be another way of slowing down for a moment and noticing what you are experiencing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n What sounds do you enjoy or feel connected to?<\/p>\n\n\n\n It might be music with a strong beat and lyrics that make you smile, something quieter and familiar, the sounds of nature, an audiobook, a relaxation exercise or a guided meditation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sometimes you may want to listen closely; at other times simply having a familiar sound in the background may feel comforting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Are there particular smells that you associate with comfort, familiarity or good memories?<\/p>\n\n\n\n It might be lavender or another scent you enjoy, baking bread or cakes, coffee, freshly washed sheets or clothes, homemade soup, the smell of the sea, woodland or freshly cut grass.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Smell can be strongly connected with memory, so pay attention to how a scent actually feels for you rather than assuming it should<\/em> be relaxing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n What do you enjoy looking at? What captures your interest or curiosity?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Perhaps photographs of friends, family or places that matter to you, a favourite film, the view from your window, the sea, forests, shops, animals \u2014 or kittens and puppies on YouTube.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sometimes looking carefully at something around you and noticing its colours, shapes, movement or details can give your attention somewhere else to rest for a moment.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n You may have found lots of comforting things for each of your senses or perhaps only a few. Either is fine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You can also experiment with combining things that feel good together:<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you find that you are often anxious or on high alert at work or while going about your day, you might choose to carry something small that helps you feel connected to the present. Perhaps photographs or music on your phone, a shell, a smooth stone or another meaningful object in your pocket.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For example, imagine the bus is busy. Lots of people are talking and the space feels a bit tight. If it feels helpful, you might put on some headphones and let some of your attention move towards the beat, lyrics or tone of the music. You might look at photographs on your phone that connect you with people, places or memories that matter to you, or gently remind yourself where you are and that the journey will come to an end.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you know a particular situation is likely to make you anxious, you can think beforehand about what might help you through it. Perhaps you could keep a shell or pebble in your pocket. How does it feel? Can you count the ridges using touch alone? Is it warm or cold? If you have a coin, can you work out which one it is without looking?<\/p>\n\n\n\n These things don’t have to make the anxiety disappear. Instead, they can give your attention something else to connect with while difficult thoughts, feelings or sensations are present.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It can take time to discover what helps you when you are anxious or overwhelmed, and something that works well on one occasion may not help in quite the same way another time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n So be gentle with yourself while you are learning and compassionate when it isn’t easy. There isn’t a perfect way to self-soothe and nobody gets it right all the time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The aim isn’t to become perfectly calm or to make difficult feelings disappear, but gradually to discover what helps you feel more supported, present and able to move through difficult moments.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Cover image courtesy of Simon Migaj.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Feeling anxious or on high alert is a normal response to difficult, uncertain or threatening situations. Usually, these feelings settle when the situation passes. For some people, however, being on alert can become a much more familiar way of experiencing the world.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":100,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-99","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/new.centredcounselling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/new.centredcounselling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/new.centredcounselling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/new.centredcounselling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/new.centredcounselling.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=99"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/new.centredcounselling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":213,"href":"https:\/\/new.centredcounselling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99\/revisions\/213"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/new.centredcounselling.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/100"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/new.centredcounselling.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=99"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/new.centredcounselling.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=99"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/new.centredcounselling.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=99"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n\n\n\nTouch<\/strong><\/mark><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nTaste<\/mark><\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nSound<\/mark><\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nSmell<\/strong><\/mark><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nSight<\/mark><\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
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